Ahah, my life is a joke.

I must admit, it's a lot harder to make friends here than it was at state, especially girlfriends. But I'm thankful for the 3 that I do have. Including my gay.

Don't think. Do. Do, and create.

My horoscope told me to stop being afraid of falling in love everyday.

Within the next few paychecks, I need:

1. Canon Point & Shoot (I'm thinking the under-water because it's snazzy)
2. Samsung Fascinate or Droid Incredible

Not too bad, no?

I constantly remind myself to take it easy. No one else can handle me, so I have to be able to handle myself.

I think I've found a pretty solid safe zone.



And you know what else? I've always dreamt about living in the city, and meeting some handsome fellow on the subway, a little eye-contact, smiles of acknowledgement. You know, cute, movie-type stuff. And well, it happened, and something else probably would have happened if I had been 21. Damn myself for being all shy with someone I'm attracted to. It doesn't happen very often, especially not now, but when it does I get nervous. Because I get nervous, it makes me even more nervous, but I keep my cool. And try not to seem like a bitch. Sigh. It was so cute how it happened too. Just got out of eating dinner with my gay, trying to meet up with the bestie after work, we're having a blast, okay. Then a very masculinely feminine woman tells my gay, "Your girl is beautiful, by the way!" And he looks at me and says, "I wanted to be like, 'honey, do you think I fux wit chicks?'" Love him, lolz. Just had to write that out too, this was a good day for me. So anyway, meeting the bestie at the Bart, we're on the train, we're telling her what happens, and my gay is loud. If he's anywhere near you, you know it. So we're talking, having a blast, and this man walks on, and sits sort of across from me. Naturally, I just glance over and I'm like, "Oh, dang," Cordell sees that I do this and he's like, "Mm, not bad" But I'm all smiley, and the guy hears I suppose, and here's our conversations after, and just smiles and throwing glances back over at me every once in a while, but I'm too nervous to look at him by this point. We get off at the same stop as this man, and we engage in a little more small talk. By the time we're about to walk out, the security seems whack, and I figured it would be a good start to a conversation, so I walk over behind this man as he's refilling his card. He knows we were scoping out the place to hop, and he says to me, "Yeah, this place is pretty difficult to hop." And we're talking, yeah, awesome. He invites us to his show, but then asks us if we're 21 because they're playing at a bar. But neither of us are, goddammit, and I don't know why I didn't stay and talk more, but I missed my chance. And he was handsome. I will forever be wondering if I will ever see his face again, what instrument he plays, what he enjoys and doesn't enjoy. But who knows? Maybe. Hopefully, I'll run into him again one day. Then I got super trashed after and regretted it. Not really, I just don't think I can drink four loko's ever again.