I don't want to feel like the world is out to get me, but I really can't help it. You just up'd and left me. Like he did. I can't help but think you guys were talking about this all along behind my back and still just won't let me know for your own stupid purposes. The worst part is, I have no idea why I'm feeling this way about HIM. We talked for a mere couple weeks, but that was seriously the happiest I've been in a while. When he touched me, he meant it. Or at least it felt as if he did. I still can't help but think I'm the spawn of Satan, put on this world just to test peoples loyalties and bring them down with me whenever I can. I prayed and prayed for Evan and I to work out because he was everything I could have wanted in a man right down to the T. At least I had him when I had him. It still sucks though. This so-called vacation is now turning lonely, which is the exact reason why I didn't want to be here in the first place. Ugh..two more months and then I get to see my sister, my father, and my beloved San Diego.

Should really take Pablo up on that ticket to Florida. I've been here for 4 days and I already want to leave. Surprise, surprise.

Everyone here just thinks I'm fucked up, and I am, but so are they.


ps. it's just silly that they were both trying to talk to me at the same time, and then now what? boys and their stupid competitiveness.

I just want you to give us a chance.